Un-sure of Where Life Is Taking Me

I am graduating from college in a month and have no plans for life after college. The only thing that I seem to be sure about is where I am going to live. I am engaged to the most amazing man who has a job here in Rapid. I don't feel like I could tell him that I don't care about his career I am getting a job somewhere else. The only problem with this is that there almost no civil enineering jobs here. That leaves me with trying to figure out what I am going to do.

I have thought about a lot of different options such as:
- going back to school for outdoor education
- going back to school to be a high school teacher
- take classes so I can become a paramedic/ forest firefighter/ ski patrol
- find a job working for a non-profit
- convince Mr. P to let me be a homemake (least likely as I have strong feminist views and he probably wouldn't agree)

The most appealing to me would be a mix of all. I have already applied and been accepted to BH, so I could take a class or 2 this fall. I have also thought about running away and living in an ashram for awhile. I even found one that I really like.

Exhausted

I am exhausted in every way possible.

I am mentally and phsycologically exhausted from school, work, and AOE. I feel like I can never get ahead. As soon as I finish one thing two more things get thrown at me. I constantly feel like I'm drowning.

I am physically exhausted from lack of sleep. I feel like I can never get enough sleep. I went to Mexico for a week and slept all I want and I am still exhausted.

True To The Name of This Blog

I have been completely avoiding this blog. I keep telling myself that I am too busy to sit down and write something. In reality I think I am just afraid. I read all these other blogs and they are amazing. I am afraid that I will never be able to write a blog like them.

Well today I decided that I am done being afraid. Life is getting really stressful and I need a place to write down everything thats in my mind. So from now on I will be true to the name of my blog and use this as an outlet for my mind. I won't wait for a theme to come to me, I will just write.